This needs a good edit/rewrite. I was saving it for something but can't be bothered now.

Gravity ruled the Earth with a heavy hand. She held down her subjects, shackled them, kept them tied to the ground. They rebelled. They built themselves wings and jumped from mountains but just as they felt themselves gaining traction on the air Gravity pulled them down hard. They dreamt of angels: humans with wings who could float up into the clouds to be with god. Gravity’s subjects wanted to be with god.
    They built hot air balloons but they couldn’t make hot air to reach the clouds so they gradually sank back to earth. This was an improvement. Gravity wasn’t pulling them so hard. They played in their balloons for a long time but it wasn’t enough. They still wanted to be with god. So they built aeroplanes. The first few didn’t work. The next batch could only glide, not fly. After that there were some which flew but could only reach low altitudes. Then finally planes reached the clouds.
    The clouds were a disappointment. Gravity’s subjects searched cirrus and stratus and everywhere in between but God wasn’t there. At night after a long day’s searching they looked up at the sky, still searching for God. Someone said “Maybe he lives on the Moon.”
    They couldn’t figure out how to get to the Moon for a long time, Gravity was too strong for them. Russia and America decided that some friendly competition might help them figure out how to get to the Moon more quickly. The competition worked but the Moon was another disappointment. God wasn’t on the Moon. Gravity wasn’t on the Moon either, so everyone on the Earth got into Russian and American space shuttles and flew up to the Moon.
    Now that they lived on the Moon the Humans didn’t have to worry about Gravity anymore. This meant that they could spend more time figuring out how to find God. Some people were very negative, they said “Maybe God doesn’t exist.”
    Some people were a little less negative and they said “Sure we don’t have to worry about Gravity anymore and we know how to fly through space now but our chances of finding God are tiny. In case you haven’t noticed: the Universe goes on and on forever in every direction.”
    But some people were positive. The positive people said “God must live somewhere in our Solar System. He couldn’t have made it so detailed if he was any further away.”
    So while the negative people stayed on the Moon and played in Hot Air Balloons, the positive people build really good spaceships and searched all the planets. Mars was the only interesting one. Mars had Martians but the positive people didn’t get along with the Martians because the Martians didn’t believe in God. Some of the very negative people went to live on Mars and they crossbred with the Martians. The Human/Martian babies were very pretty but they aged incredibly quickly, dying only a week after being born.
    It would have been funny if God was on Uranus but he wasn’t. The positive people went to Pluto to look for God, even though they had decided years ago that Pluto wasn’t really a planet. God wasn’t on Pluto. More and more positive people were turning into negative people and going to live on Mars and crossbreeding with Martians and their children were dying after a week, so there weren’t many Humans left anymore.
    One of the positive people said “Maybe he lives on the Sun.”
    Hearing this, all of the other positive people turned into negative people and said “Don’t be stupid. The Sun is too hot for God to live on. Don’t be stupid.”
    The last positive person was called Greg. Greg didn’t think he was a stupid person so he decided to go and look for God on the Sun. God wasn’t on the Sun. Greg couldn’t face the embarrassment of facing everyone who had said he was stupid for thinking God might live on the Sun so Greg went to Earth instead. He had always wanted to see the Eiffel Tower. When Greg got to Earth he saw God walking around, looking for Humans. Greg went up to God and said “We’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
    God said “Where have you been? Why did you leave me all alone?”
    Greg said “We couldn’t find you. No one believes in you anymore.”
    God said “My wife and I have missed you all so much.”
    Greg said “Wife?”
    God said “When I am gone Gravity will be all alone.”
    God died.
    Greg cried.
    When Greg finished crying Gravity introduced herself to him. They fell in love and had children which Gravity spoiled. She let them float a few inches off the ground.